Did I really just say that outloud?????

"get on the scale maybe you'll have a good day." is what I said to myself and then sat there stunned and a little afraid. Is this what I've become? 3 digits (preferably 2) on a digital scale, letting this heartless souless machine that doesn't even know what the numbers mean decide my destiny for the day and put a smile on my face or tears in my eyes. You see I've always just thought of myself as someone with bipolar 2 and body image "issues", but lately these issues have been morphing into full on taking over my life and thoughts. There has to be a way to take back my life.... I just haven't figured it out yet.